• Learn key concepts regarding violence prevention
• Gain the confidence to de-escalate volatile situations
• Keep organizations, personnel, and clients safe and secure

See the two-minute video below for a brief explanation.

The post STAMP: Violence Prevention and De-escalation Training for Organizations first appeared on Whittier Counseling Center.

The post Are you interested in managing your anger effectively? Attend our new anger management classes! first appeared on Whittier Counseling Center.

The post 52 – Week Domestic Violence Prevention Classes first appeared on Whittier Counseling Center.

I am very loving, and you are lucky to have me • If you don’t listen to me, you’re just going to do it wrong • You’re cheating on me, aren’t you? • I just get angry sometimes • Men are abused just as much as women are • I just have low self-esteem • I lose control • I’m just afraid of abandonment • Only you can make me feel like this • I do it because I care about you • You’re just like my last partner

When we think of domestic violence, we may picture the stereotype of the man who openly acts aggressively toward everyone. Domestic violence is diverse. It exists across age groups, as well as between and across genders. Virtually anyone can be an abuser, but there are things one can look out for. Lundy Bancroft, a researcher, and authority figure on the topic of domestic abuse offers some alternative images to contemplate.

The Demand Man, having little sense of giving and taking, will exaggerate their contributions, punishing their partner for “not giving enough”, be that not true. Mr. Right is the ultimate authority figure on everything. Without consideration, they will speak condescendingly to their partner, and they seek to control their partner’s thinking. The Water Torturer is extremely calm. They constantly front the image of one who is level-headed, yet will employ aggressive conversational tactics, and they excessively gaslight their partner. Mr. Sensitive tends to skate by undetected. Nearly the opposite to the stereotypical, outwardly-aggressive abuser, Mr. Sensitive can be incredibly soft, gentle, and supportive when observed. They seem educated and self-aware, but at the same time, they say insensitive things and brush over hurt feelings. The “Victim” thinks life has simply been unfair and usually blames their behavior on their partner. The partner is afraid to leave, “what if they can’t take care of themselves without me.”

These are all archetypes of abusers that are often overlooked. Their tactics may seem vastly different from those we see in media, but there are truths to all persons who abuse: they are controlling, they feel entitled to their behavior, they twist things into their opposites, they disrespect their partner and feel superior, they confuse love and abuse, they strive for a relatively good public image, and feel justified in their actions. Sometimes, we may hear stories from loved ones of experiences that they intuit to be “off”. “Something just isn’t right.” It is possible they have encountered Mr. Right or perhaps a Mr. Sensitive. Maybe, we are the friend in this situation. Nonetheless, we have an obligation to ourselves and our loved ones to pay attention to that voice inside of us that something is “off”. Is their version of abuse different? Do they get insanely jealous, but are at other times completely rational? Do they succeed in getting people to take their side? Do they lose control sometimes, yet are frighteningly calculated at other times? Do they seem like they are changing, but ultimately nothing is different? Simply noticing these red flags can save a life.

The post The Many Faces of Domestic Violence first appeared on Whittier Counseling Center.

Domestic violence is an unhealthy behavioral pattern in which a person abuses another person in order to gain control. It is an intentional and recurring behavior. The abuse can be physical, psychological, financial or of sexual nature.

Physical abuse may include throwing objects, pulling hair, pinching, burning, choking, punching, biting, kicking, scratching and pushing. Consequences may range from an injury to death.

Psychological abuse may include intimidation, destruction of belongings, removal of basic resources (such as food, clothes and health assistance), threats, humiliation, accusations, isolation, insults (mild or aggressive), negative criticism, mocking, sarcasm and non-physical punishments. This type of abuse may lead a person to develop traumas, disorders, lack of self-confidence and destructive thoughts.

Financial or economic abuse means controlling access to economic resources or activities that allow a person to generate income so as to reduce the victim’s self-sufficiency and force them to become financially dependent on the abuser. This kind of abuse is usually related to the unauthorized or illegal use of properties, money and other valuable items.

Sexual abuse refers to forcing somebody to participate in any kind of sex-related act without their consent. It can also refer to the control over sexual activity by means of violence and emotional abuse.

Any person can be a victim of domestic violence, regardless of their gender, sexual preference, race, age, religion or educational and socioeconomic background. Domestic violence can take place in heterosexual, homosexual and bisexual relationships.

According to the World Health Organization, 1 out of 3 women suffer from some kind of physical or sexual abuse. The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV) found that 1 out of 7 men is severely abused by his partner. In terms of gay couples, some studies have found that domestic violence takes place in 1 out of 3 relationships.

Enduring domestic violence may cause different kinds of emotions, such as anxiety, depression, confusion, guilt, shame, anger, loneliness and frustration. These emotions are a normal reaction to abuse. If the abuse is not stopped, the victim can develop physical or mental disorders.

Domestic violence does not only affect people being abused directly, but also family members, friends, colleagues and the whole community. Children exposed to domestic violence are frequently more predisposed to getting involved in abusive relationships. This creates a new generation of victims and abusers.

If you or somebody you know is suffering from domestic violence, make a toll-free call to 1 800 799-7233 or visit thehotline.org to get confidential help in your language.

The post Domestic Violence first appeared on Whittier Counseling Center.